Anna Kournikova stopped by the New York Stock Exchange to ring the bell and clearly provided a little extra stimulus for the brokers on the trading floor. That one guy behind her looks like he's almost ready to make his big move, but can't decide if he should refer to his penis as the only stimulus package she needs, or simply tell her she can ring his bell anytime. In this economy, we all have to make some tough decisions.

Because when it comes to selling stuff beauty is far more important than relevance, K-Swiss continues to feature Anna Kournikova as the face of their brand even though she hasn't played competitive tennis in years or done much else. I don't really have a problem with this other than the fact that Anna no longer looks like a tennis player; she was always skinny but also toned and in phenomenal shape, now she looks more like she just doesn't eat very much and if you were to hit her with a tennis ball she might break a femur. On the other hand, I consulted my penis regarding this matter and he politely informed me that he would still love to do terrible things to Ms. Kournikova and I should just keep my mouth shut.

Anna Kournikova was playing tennis for a change and had the courtesy to remind us why we miss her so much. Click the photo to the right for the larger version, because you know you want to guys.

Now a question for the ladies. Don't you just hate it when your man attempts to initiate sex, you turn him down because you're not in the mood, and then he goes and urinates on your dog in revenge? Oh, this isn't normal behavior you say?

College Humor presents Governing Bodies, in which girls basically endorse Obama or McCain using a pen and parts of their bodies (i.e. mostly breasts).

Good luck ever topping this photo of John McCain, Sarah Palin, and a well placed microphone combined with some good photographic timing.

I was part way through a post about the media's coverage of Jennifer Hudson's family being killed when I came across the much funnier and shockingly true agenda response posted over at Gawker.

My Name is Earl star Nadine Velazquez sizzles in Loaded. She's been all over the place lately - is she in a movie I didn't hear about?

Paris Hilton is getting paid a lot less for showing up to events. It could be the economy, or maybe club owners are finally realizing that whore isn't worth the money.

Nothing but good wholesome fun playing the Celebrity Ass Detective game.