Ashlee Simpson was photographed with her absurdly-named baby, Bronx Mowgli. Now that the kid is several months old, I'm sure Pete Wentz is starting to get suspicious and wondering if he's really the father. "But Ashlee, WHERE are his emo bangs?! This can't be right!" Maybe that's why Pete has been busy partying with strippers in Las Vegas instead of changing diapers. That or he was scared away by Ashlee's severely misguided taste in hats.

Fall Out Boy and Pete Wentz performed at The Palms in Las Vegas over the weekend, and to show her support wife Ashlee drove all the way out from Los Angeles, only to head straight home following the show to be with their baby. Pete was apparently so touched by this move that he decided to party with some strippers.

The Fall Out Boy bassist — who was without his wife of nearly one year — partied hard with about 50 band members, dancers and pals (including Girls Next Door star Holly Madison) following a sold-out show at the Palms Casino Resort on April 5.

"Everybody was going absolutely crazy," an eyewitness tells Star. "People were even drunkenly playing makeshift Slip 'n' Slide with a mat and lubricant. And Pete was in great spirits. He was dancing and singing along to his band's own songs, grinding up against the dancers."

At one point he was "dancing on a pool table with the girls," the partygoer adds.

However, earlier in the day, Ashlee — who headed back home after attending FOB's April 4 concert in Irvine, Calif. — Twittered: "I am beyond sad to leave my love... My heart is breaking as we drive home." And also:"I need my hubs." (Star Magazine)

This whole story only gets better when you consider that at the exact moment her husband was probably bumping uglies with a stripper, Ashlee was on Twitter posting things like, "I am beyond sad to leave my love... My heart is breaking as we drive home." Which, I might add, she later removed from her updates. That's the great thing about Twitter - it allows us to laugh at celebrities in a much more personal way than before.

Don't worry, Ashlee, based on these pictures you clearly have nothing to worry about. On the other hand, if the stripper had dyed black hair and ridiculous emo bangs, then I could see cause for concern.

This photo shoot from People magazine of Ashlee Simpson and now-husband Pete Wentz was presumably taken before they had a baby, but it serves as a good reminder that she is way too hot for him. Of course, when you have the most annoying father in all of showbiz outside of Lindsay Lohan, that does drop your stock a little. Let this be a warning to all of you overbearing fathers out there, if you're too obnoxious and/or creepy your daughter could end up with some Emo guy too.

There's little doubt that before baby Bronx Mowgli was even half way out of his daughter Ashlee's womb, Joe Simpson was on the phone with various gossip magazines preparing to sell the rights to the exclusive first photos and possibly throw in the afterbirth as an added bonus. The problem is, especially in a crappy economy, no magazines are willing to pony up any scratch for the pictures. Page Six reports:

ASHLEE Simpson and Pete Wentz are trying to drum up some cash by selling photos of their baby, Bronx Mowgli - but so far, no takers. A celebrity weekly insider told Page Six, "Pete and Ashlee have approached every single celebrity magazine with offers to sell their first photos, but nobody wants them. Covers of them tend not to sell well." A rep for Simpson denied it.

I love that a rep for Simpson denied this claim, as if her family wasn't trying to sell the photos in the first place after they've spent the last few years whoring themselves out in just about every conceivable way.

Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz finally had their baby last night, a boy, and because they're famous they caved into pressure and gave their baby a ridiculous name that will haunt him for the rest of his life: Bronx Mowgli Wentz.

Just once, can't a celebrity couple name their kid James or Jason or something even close to resembling normalcy? There's going to be a Hollywood therapy group in the future where kids like Bronx, Zuma Nesta Rock, Apple, Moses and Honor can go to share their deep-seeded resentment towards their parents who had such huge egos they felt they had to give them unusual names.

Anyway, for those of you that care about the details, Bronx came in at 7 pounds 11 ounces and was 20 1/2 inches long.

I know this is a little early, but perhaps if Ashlee and Pete's next child is a girl they can name her Brooklyn or Queens. And if they keep going eventually they can cover all five boroughs of New York City.

Jessica Simpson appeared on Ellen DeGeneres' show and mentioned that her sister Ashlee may need to induce labor...

"They're going to have to. It's already developing really quick," Jessica said.

Ashlee – described by husband Pete Wentz more than two weeks ago as due at any moment – has already tried other ways to begin labor.

"Different foot massages and stuff," Jessica told DeGeneres in the show airing Wednesday. "I don't know. I think she's really just jumping around trying everything right now."

This doesn't come as a huge surprise, since it seems like Ashlee got knocked up by husband Pete Wentz forever ago, so she must be way past her due date. It's been so long this kid is probably going to come out of the womb already talking, which of course will prompt Grandpa Joe to slap a microphone in its hand and see if MTV is interested in a reality show about a singing baby.