One could claim that Justin Timberlake is a man who has everything: money, fame, and an incredibly hot Jessica Biel as a girlfriend. So as the age-old adage goes - What do you get for this kind of man? The answer is more darkness, apparently. That, or a magic potion that makes people not see you when you make out with a whore in a club, he'd like that too. Gossip blog Poison Ivy said they saw Justin with some chick in a New York club:

Poison Ivy spotted a very intoxicated JT at Avenue nightclub in New York’s Chelsea district Monday night, kissing, holding hands and canoodling with an unknown brunette in a white hat.”

Suspicious, since anyone can say anything they want on the internet. But apparently this was confirmed by good-old Lindsay Lohan, who was at the club and posted the photo above on Twitter.

“So dark- where’s jb cheater," she wrote on twitter. JB standing for Jessica Biel.

Two unreliable sources saying the same thing? Yep, that's all the proof I need. Time to go get JT! Mainstream media, grab your torches and pitchfork, we're going monster hunting. That is, unless Justin apologizes right now, then everything is forgiven... aw, never mind, I can't stay mad at JT no matter what. Here, Justin, take this envelope full of cash, you need it more than those starving orphans. No one's going to love them anyway, with or without food.