As of Saturday, Jon Gosselin has no kids. No, he didn't put them in the sack and throw them in the river, he just gave full control to Kate. Can you believe it? I was sure it was going to be the river thing. That's what I did with my ki...er...ttens.

Jon Gosselin has ceded primary custody of his eight children to estranged wife Kate, according to People.

As previously reported by AccessHollywood.com, the former couple met on Saturday for a divorce arbitration session in Pennsylvania.

A source close to Kate told People that the meeting was productive.

"This was the proceeding that essentially ended their marriage," the source told the mag. "Kate is just relieved that a very painful chapter of her life is nearly over, and she is looking forward to building a better, brighter future for herself and her kids."

According to the source, that future will include undisputed primary custody of the couple's brood.

"[Jon] didn't dispute Kate having primary custody of the kids," the source said, adding that his decision was not a surprise - and apparently, neither was the bouquet of roses that he brought to the table.

Kate reportedly turned them down.

"In what should have been their most serious moment as a couple, Jon again resorted to a publicity stunt," the source said.

What? Out-of-work, reality-TV-show-shopping, anything-for-a-buck, father-of-the-year Jon Gosselin did something for publicity when the cameras were on him? Oh, my, I'm shocked! - Seriously, why do I keep sticking a fork in the electrical socket. That's the only thing that's surprised me today