Screw you Katy Perry. No, I don't care who heard me say that, I'll say it again. Screw. You. What, you think that just because you wore a shiny breast-expanding dress to the VMAs we'll forgive you for your terrible songs and equally terrible other outfits? Well, you're absolutely right, we will, and that just makes me so angry. Yes, I am now filled with rage by the fact that I can't even remember any of the terrible things you've done in the past and only now know you as the greatest pop-singer, nay, human alive. I'm going to give you this medal of honor, Katy Perry, but I'm doing it with fury.